Shut the Door!

I know a certain fellow
By the name of Joe DeVine,
He started seeing funny things
From drinkin' too much wine;
Around his bed pink elephants
And zebras played about,
A purple monkey kissed him twice
And he began to shout:
Shut the door!
They're coming through the window!
Shut the window!
They're coming through the door!
Shut the door!
They're coming through the window!
Oh! the room is full
And won't hold any more!

A man lived in Vancouver,
In a cottage by the sea,
One night he called the sheriff up
And said "They're robbing me!
There's twenty crooks around the house,
Please tell me what to do!"
The sheriff said, "Don't let 'em in,
That's my advice to you!"
Shut the door!
They're coming through the window!
Shut the window!
They're coming through the door!
Shut the door!
They're coming through the window!
Oh! the room is full
And won't hold any more!

A Dad-to-be was waiting
For the stork to bring an heir,
Out came the nurse who said "Two storks
Have just brought you a pair!
Oh, wait! There's more storks circling 'round,
I think they're gonna light!
Looks like those storks are gonna be
Kept busy here tonight!"
Shut the door!
They're coming through the window!
Shut the window!
They're coming through the door!
Shut the door!
They're coming through the window!
Oh! the room is full
And won't hold any more!

My wife went in for rabbits
And she kept them in a hutch.
She only bought two rabbits
And it didn't seem like much;
One morning when we looked at them,
Oh, how they'd multiplied!
A million rabbits hopped right out
And all the neighbors cried:
Shut the door!
They're coming through the window!
Shut the window!
They're coming through the door!
Shut the door!
They're coming through the window!
Oh! the room is full
And won't hold any more!

The first week we were married,
My dear wifey said to me,
"I'm feeling kind of lonesome
For my darling family.
Can we invite them for awhile,
Since we've got room to spare?"
They eat me out of house and home,
They're getting in my hair! Oh!
Shut the door!
They're coming through the window!
Shut the window!
They're coming through the door!
Shut the door!
They're coming through the window!
Oh! the room is full
And won't hold any more!